You’re going shopping, you walk into the store, and you see some jeans.
These jeans look AMAZING.
You love this brand, they’re completely affordable, and you’ve seen celebrities wearing these exact jeans.
There’s nothing else that catches your eye, and you feel like you can’t leave the store empty-handed.
So you buy the jeans.
You take them home and put them on.
They’re not the best fit. The waistband digs in. They’re tight when you sit down.
But see how flattering they look in the mirror!
You wear the jeans the next day, and after 10 hours of wearing them, you realize they’re not terribly comfortable.
You throw them in your closet, and they end up staying there.
Because as beautiful as those jeans were, they weren’t the right fit for YOU.
He’s a Great Guy, But Is He a Great Fit?
Finding the perfect guy is a lot like finding the perfect jeans.
You go “shopping” on an online dating app.
You’re looking for someone who catches your eye AND seems “within your budget.”
There are a lot of guys who look great on paper.
They say all the right things. Their pictures aren’t too shabby, either.
And so you get your hopes up. Maybe this is the one!
You go out on a date, and it’s okay.
I mean, it’s not BAD.
He wants to see you again. That’s half the battle, right?
And you’re so tired of the online dating scene, and all the work it takes just to meet someone, and coming home after those coffee dates feeling drained and empty.
This guy is making it easy for you. He’s making it clear he’s interested. You should scoop him up before some other woman does…
3 Qualities of a Good Fit
Fit is a concept we don’t talk about enough in dating.
It doesn’t matter how amazing someone is, if they don’t fit you.
We’ve all made the mistake of buying an item of clothing because of how good it looks and not how good it FEELS.
If something looks good but doesn’t feel good, you won’t wear it.
But when you’re in the moment, you’re not thinking that far ahead. You’re caught up in the excitement of buying something.
Putting that item of clothing back on the rack and walking out of the store empty-handed is a test of willpower.
It can feel the same way on a date.
In the heat of the moment, when an attractive guy seems to like you, it feels like you’d be a fool to say no.
That’s when you need to stop thinking about HIM—whether he’s a catch, what your friends would think of him—and start thinking about how well you fit together.
Look for these 3 signs.
He’s comfortable to be with.
Some people are exciting. They thrill you. You can’t predict what they’ll do next.
You get swept up in THEIR energy…
Not realizing that life with this person will always revolve around THEM.
There’s nothing wrong with dating a guy because he makes your life exciting.
But lifelong relationships are a little different.
Lifelong relationships have an everyday feel.
They’re not like the special jeans you bust out for special occasions.
They’re like your comfy everyday jeans. The ones you can move in. The ones you can breathe in. The ones that don’t require you to suck in your stomach!
You can be your real self with him.
When you put on your favorite jeans, you’re ready to take on the world.
You’re not putting on an outfit. You’re slipping into your second skin.
It’s like that with the right person.
The right person feels like a natural extension of you.
He doesn’t need you to put on an act for him. He likes you as you are.
And when you’re with him, you feel ready to take on the world.
Your relationship doesn’t feel “too tight.”
Tight jeans may look great in the mirror, but it’s such a relief when you get home and finally take them off.
Your relationship also feels fabulous when you’re out with your guy and all eyes are on you as a couple. So much better than going to events alone!
But then you tell him goodbye, and you go home alone, and you sink into the comfort of your own space. This also feels good. You can take up the whole sofa. You don’t have to share.
You know you’re with the right person when you don’t have to shrink yourself or squeeze yourself into the relationship.
You have room to breathe.
There’s enough space for him to be himself, for you to be yourself, and for the two of you to be a couple.
And when you find a relationship like that…
One that feels comfortable, natural, authentic to who you are…
Don’t take it for granted. Practice the art of gratitude for something that never gets old.