You had a great time.
He was fun. You had tons to talk about. You laughed like crazy. The date stretched on for hours.
You’re sure he likes you—and the feeling is mutual.
But as you walk towards the parking lot together, you start to feel nervous. Goodbyes always make you feel awkward. You’re never sure what to do. You’re also aware that this is the moment of truth. Either he’ll ask to see you again, or he won’t.
How do you keep yourself from blowing it?
These three tips will help.
#1. Wind it down
The end of a date isn’t the time to pack in the last few things you wanted to talk to him about. It’s time to relax and wind down.
Maybe you’re someone who talks more when you get nervous. If your nerves kick in at the end of a date and you find yourself talking nonstop, give the conversation a break. Consciously redirect your attention to how nice it is to be heading home after having had a wonderful time.
Look around you and listen to the sounds of traffic and people. Point out something in the environment to him. Walk in companionable silence, enjoying the evening.
Having a quiet moment gives him the opportunity to think about whether he wants to see you again and how he might ask you.
#2. Let him lead
Most men feel just as anxious and awkward as you do at the end of a date. They feel pressure to say the right thing. They don’t want to go in for a kiss and get rejected.
If you’re nervous as well, it can make his nerves even worse.
Something that can help you relax is remembering that the pressure isn’t on you; it’s on him. All you have to do is smile and thank him for a wonderful evening.
It’s always polite to thank your date for taking the time to come out and meet you. First dates are risky. Not everyone will make the effort. The fact that you both were willing to take time out of your schedule to meet up says a lot about both of you.
If you had a great time, tell him. You might think it’s obvious that you enjoyed his company, but he needs to hear it from your lips. Unless he’s relatively confident you want to see him again, he won’t push his luck by asking for a second date.
#3. Ace the first date hug
These days, men feel more comfortable ending a first date with a hug than a kiss, especially if it’s a daytime date.
A first date hug is not the same as a hug between friends. It’s a hug with a mission:
To determine whether you’ve got chemistry.
If you’re nervous, or if you’re not sure about this guy, he’ll be able to tell. Your body will feel tense. You’ll keep a healthy distance between you as you hug with one arm only.
A guy who really likes you may hope for more from the hug. He might hold you against him a few moments longer than you’d expect. He’s testing to see whether you have a physical connection.
If you’re not expecting a prolonged hug, you may be caught off guard and pull back. Pulling back could communicate to him that you’re not feeling the same chemistry he is.
So it’s important to know that he’s not hugging you because it’s polite. If he’s into you, he’s hoping that physical contact will kindle some sparks. He may even be hoping you turn your face to his for a kiss! (If you want a kiss, glanced down at his lips twice instead of just holding his gaze.)
How can you make sure that goodbye hug is a great one?
If you’ve been winding down the date and reminding yourself that what happens next is up to him, you should be feeling relaxed and happy by the time you hug him goodbye.
All you have to do is enjoy the hug. Take a moment, maybe close your eyes, and notice if you feel any sparks. Remember: it’s not just about whether he’s into you—you have to be feeling it, too!
When you break the embrace, give him a big smile to let him know you enjoyed getting a bit closer.
Men crave your approval more than you may realize. They’re looking for green lights to tell them it’s okay to proceed. Unfortunately, shyness and nerves can prevent you from giving him the right signals.
Relax, don’t put pressure on yourself, and enjoy the moment. That’s all you need to do to end a first date he won’t be able to forget.