9 Ways to “Speak Dating”

These days, dating has its own language.

You’ve probably already heard words like breadcrumbing, ghosting, and love bombing before

But you may not have heard about roaching, mosting, and hesidating.

These new words can seem like unnecessary jargon…

Until you go out with a guy who roaches you, and you wonder how you ever lived without that word!

Many of these terms were coined by dating apps to describe trends they observed in their users.

So let’s take a look at some of the trending online dating behaviors.

  • Infla-dating

Dating app Plenty of Fish predicted that one of the biggest dating trends in 2023 would be infla-dating.

Infla-dating refers to choosing less expensive or free date options over more expensive ones.

Not splashing out on dates is no longer a sign of a date’s stinginess but rather a way to show respect for the way inflation has affected everyone’s budgets.

(Does “Netflix and chill” count as infla-dating or is it just plain lazy? Share your thoughts in the comments!)

  • Eco-dumping

Another trend that Plenty of Fish has observed is eco-dumping.

Eco-dumping refers to the practice of breaking up with someone because of their lack of concern about the environment.

Although it can seem petty to break up with someone over their refusal to recycle, eco-dumping is more about a lack of shared values.

Today’s singles are more politically-minded than ever. For them, politics are less about policies and more about values. A date’s stance on politics is seen as a shorthand for their views on science, family values, and so forth.

So don’t be surprised if a date asks what you think about a politically-charged topic. What they really want to know is what values you live by.

  • Slow dating

A slew of new dating terms refer to what might be healthier ways to date.

One example is slow dating, coined by the French dating app Once.

When you’re slow dating, you’re taking your time. You’re minimizing the time you spend on the dating app, because you spend the bulk of your time offline enjoying life. You only talk to a few matches at a time.

This is in direct contrast to the swipe mentality promoted by Tinder, and it may help you enjoy the time you spend on apps more.

  • Sober dating

Not everyone wants to go for drinks on a first date. Not everyone drinks.

Find like minds by suggesting sober dates where alcohol isn’t on the menu.

  • Dawn dating

Don’t like staying up late? You’re not alone!

If you’re at your best in the mornings, suggest a morning date like coffee or a nature walk.

  • Untyping

Tired of the same old guys? Then try untyping.

Untyping is when you deliberately decide to date against type. You take a chance on men you wouldn’t normally be attracted to.

This doesn’t mean you say yes to guys who aren’t compatible with you. It just means that you pay a little more attention to guys you’d normally pass by.

  • Hesidating

Other terms describe dating behavior that feels iffy or outright wrong.

For example, you might meet a man who’s hesidating.

He’s on the dating app and talking to women, but he’s not sure what he wants. Does he want to be dating? Is he in the right space for a relationship? He doesn’t really know.

  • Mosting

Mosting is similar to love bombing.

This guy comes on strong. He woos you with compliments, romantic gestures, and big promises. He gets close to you fast.

On the one hand, it’s flattering. Who doesn’t like being pursued as if you’re the most desirable woman he’s ever met?

On the other hand, it’s odd. He doesn’t know you all that well. How can he be so sure about you after just a few dates?

You’ll find out what’s going on a short time later…

When he disappears on you.

Yep, your passionate admirer has just ghosted you.

Chances are, you’re not the first woman he’s done this to.

Be wary of men who come on too strong too fast. Solid relationships take time.

  • Roaching

Roaching is the modern term for the age-old phenomenon of finding out that your new guy is still seeing other women.

He tells you that he didn’t realize you thought your relationship was exclusive. He assumed you knew it was just casual.

Head off the roaches by having a very clear, explicit conversation about whether you’re still seeing other people. Don’t assume anything.

Which of these new dating terms do you think you’ll use the most?

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