Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Of course it does!
I even asked myself what do i want to do for myself. What would make me happy.. but unfortunately didn’t get the answer. I realize it wouldn’t work between us anyway. I realize his behavior in everything- it’s not exactly what i am looking for. But i still feel numb.Sure you are right. But i still sent him a good bye letter. Just wrote what i feel and what i think, honestly. Without blaming him. Without being victim or passive agressive. He red some of messages. Last one he didn’t even open. He did not reply but it does not really matter.
I wanted to close the door. I undestood it just hurt me. For one month it’s hurting me. I thougt i am crazy anxious and he is perfect but it was gaslighting. I was not imaginning that he was disconnecting time by time and wait for love for me to come. I don’t want to leave in a fear of being abandoned in every moment. Or to wait if he chooses me or not. I am not a pair of pants in storage.
He is unsure. Okay. I want someone who is sure.I felt happier when i was single. Isn’t it a sign that we are not meant to be toghether?
If i wouldnt sent him a good bye message it would be unfinished for me. I know i shouldn’t let him hurt me continuously. I knew it would be hard to let him go, thats why i didn’t do it by call. The only way to end it (for me), was to say good bye.
Thank you girls that you been here for me. Thank you for everything. Your help was enormous
Dear Spyce! Thanks a lot for a reply! It makes sense what are you saying. I am not willing to chase anyone. I am not discussing my value with anyone. I just want clearity. I am not even sure if i still want him, since i will stay with this bitter taste from this situation he put me now…
No one cross 3000 km and then drive 20 h , so after few meetings to say to a woman that he doesn’t love her YET. It’s a nonsense to me
I want that we will get to know each other better. But I don’t know how to communicate it to him in order to not feel as being desperate. It’s one week since that conversation. How can I know how does he feel now about that?
Maybe after he get a message with my thoughts and a good bye statement, he will become more sure about me, if he wants me or not in his life.
Hey Spyce! Thank you for your message. We didn’t speak since that conversation. If he would do some effort to get to know me- I would give it a try.
I am just confused. He said i am special , he has feelings for me andhe will suffer if i go. I don’t understand what is the problem. He asked me if he would ever really love me. Really? 🙄 I didn’t put pressure. Didn’t ask if he loves me.
This situation doesn’t feel good to me. One week passed , i called him once he was with friends, we talked very shortly. Sunday he called me. I didn’t see then I called back 2 hours ago he was at a meeting. He replied, asked to connect the camera.. i said if he is busy it’s ok to talk later. He said he will call back and didn’t. 2 days passed. I don’t know if I should wait. I think I should send him a good bye message. I still have feelings for him. But I don’t want to live in illusions.Actually it’s weird to hear that i scared him moving to fast since i was the one who was always do it swoler, and he was the ine to bring to the love subject. So.. i did not really get with what i scared him. But thank you for the opinion!
Hey there.
I didn’t ask him if he loves me. I said we should take it slow. He was the one to bring it up. I just asked the honest reason for him pulling away. He said he crossed a half of the world to feel “that” feeling with me. He expected it. And it didn’t come. He thought we will meet and he will forget about how he been hurt by women and will feel it in the air. Will lose his mind and will want to move together.
Of course it couldn’t happen. After you get hurt it’s harder to let yourself to fall inlove. He said he has feelings for me. But not love. He asked me if it will appear in time. But how can I know?
I still didn’t give him an answer. He say we are in relationship. He say he doesn’t want to go with other women. You think all it’s a lie? I want to break up. I’ll tell him I’m done
So he called me yesterday. We had a LONG phone conversation until almost 4 am…
I told him what do i feel. And how do i feel. And he said… he doesn’t love me. This time we hardly been in touch he said he wanted to get more space to understand if he feels incomplete when i am not around and he didnt feel. Well i did not tel him this but i think he didnt feel that he miss me because i just didn’t let him. I didn’t give him this space. I was trying to reach out. He was responding. It s not “space”.
He told me: “ are you sad? Because if it hurts you, it hurt me, too. If you’re happy, i am happy, too. You are not a stranger but now i don’t want more than what we have. I wish i could tell you from my heart that i love you but unfortunately i am not inlove. And i don’t know maybe it will come, maybe not. I like very much what is between us now, i think you are perfect. But for this moment i don’t want more than this. If you decide to cut me – it will hurt me a lot but i will handle it, if it hurts you to be with me so for you will be the right decision if you choose to go.”
He asked me if i want to have a relationship that will be like what we had till now, without a sure vision on future.
I didn’t ask him to do some serious steps. He just said he wish he would be in love with me and he doesn’t. He said this conversation made him feel lonely and upset. He said he doesn’t feel to se other women. He said he doesn’t have anyone else and doesn’t want to date anyone else. He also said “maybe i don’t feel what you fell but it doesn’t mean i have no feelings for you. I care about you. I find a lot of positive things about you and not even one minus”. He said he doesnt want to push me to take any decision so “lets decide tomorrow”.I am just trying to understand if he is pushing me, expecting and wanting me to leave or there is a hope for something serious between us. I couldn’t give him an answer yesterday so we just went to sleep. Pf course i am willing to fight for us. But i dont know if it worth. If its not a waste of time.
Dear Heidi, i changed my focus. Instead of analizing what does he like or/and think about me – i want to try analizing what do i really like and want about him. If i am in a toxic relationship, or the anxiety comes from my head? Do i accept/want this kind of behavior or not? For now this analizing process it’s not really successful. But at least it released the stress a bit.
I am enough. I always was enough. If not for him – so for myself. For my son. For whoever chose to be near by.I want a man for who i will be enough. I am still not sure that i can find the perfect fit.
We didn’t speak about that, yet. But i will, in order to understand if it’s good for me what is between us.
Thank you for everything!
It will be really hard for me to stop myself from doing anything just to make him keep this relationship
