[Kathy F]

Hi Heidi, I frel wishy washy. I cant seem to let Chris go. I’ve tried. We’ve been texting recently. Hes been quite nice. I don’t know what to do. At this point, id he asked me back, I’d go. We would probably fail. Im not done with my behavoir modification counseling yet. I come from trauma in all situations. I teactbinstead of respond. I don’t know the trauma. Ive blocked out my childhood. No way to really find out. So what do I do. I still bbn think about himveveryday, all day. Its such an exhausting behavoir. Im at my wits end.

[Kathy F]

I have made a decision. I am not going to pursue a relationship with Chris. He has shown me his love is conditional on what I do for him and how I behave. I am no longer willing to live my life this way.

So goodbye Chris. Have a nice life and never speak to me again.

Thank you Heidi for your incredible insight. I appreciate it

Kathy

[Kathy F]

Hi Heidi, thank bv you for your answer. Your questions made ne think. And Yes, I did love our relationship. We got along like two peas in a pod. In the beginning, we were perfect together. Then the fighting started when my then 33 yo daughter moved to Laramie with her 4 yo son, my grandson, Braden. Chris took an instant dislike to Taylor, my daughter. He then started to try to distance me from her. Telling me I didnt need to see her so often. He’d prefer she not come over so much. Honestly, she wasn’t doing anything wrong, he just didn’t like her taking up my time. Ever. He would complain and have little tantrums so eventually I stopped seeing Taylor so much (even tho we didn’t see that much of each other. Then she moved back to Arizona. Our relationship improved some, but by this time I was angry and hurt over it. Then my little sister, Kandi, moved to Laramie. Suddenly it was the same shit all over again. Only replace Taylors name with Kandis. Now Kandi was taking up all my time and Kandi didnt need to spend so much time with me. Again, we saw each other maybe 1 time a week. I had forgotten this about him.

Now Im really confused. I’m not sure anymore if I do want to get what we had back. Chris even told me he was jealous of any time I spent away from him. He said I didnt respect him by having “my family” at his house so much. Now that Ive remembered I’m not sure I can deal with this.

I’m mad, frustrated, and beginning to see the light. What do I do with these feelings?

[Kathy F]

More info! When he was fighting the pneumonia, his oxygen levels were at 77%. Doesn’t that cause sone type of brain damage? Who knows how long his oxygen was that low? That could be why he’s acting like he is. Lack of oxygen to the brain.

I still love him even tho he showed immaturity when he broke up with me over text. We’ve had s ok me pretty awesome times together, and our live is real. I asked him recently if he still had feelings for me and he said yes. But couldn’t go back to the yelling and fighting. I told him I was in behavoir modification classes, which I am, but he stopped communicating with me that day.

How do I get him back with me where he belongs? Please someone help me figure this out.
Thank you

Kathy F

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