[Keri A]

Hi spyce
I tried to have a conversation with him and he will not answer my questions ove asked him.if there is someone else and he said think what you want too , ove lost of weight i can not sleep im an overthinker,he told he loved me the other day before he went out .How i feel is affecting me im trying not to let it but it creeps in and what ever i try from irresistible its not working .

Thank you
Keri

[Keri A]

Hi spyce
Thank you for gettimg back to me.When he is going out he will tell me were he is going but i over think on things and i know its not healthy but i do.He wont be open and honest with me ,he told me that he is done but wants me to act normal towards his family as he doesn’t want them to know.I dont think i could handle an open relationship if im honest but im willing to do anything to fix my marriage.Im not sure if he is compareing me to the women he speaks too .I want to get him to be open and honest with me he says I’ve done nothing wrong and nothing is my fault but then saying im insecure.I leave him be when he is in the livingroom i keep my self busy , im puttin my self into the gym and thinking of going back to collage. I’m always on the go i do spend time with my friend dont have many as i like to keep my circl3 small cause of drama,I like to organize things and i redecorate our home im always doing something and finding things to improve or new challenges to come my way .He wont tell me if ge loves me he has completely shut off from me wont talk about us i don’t evan know if he is attracted to me or interested in me as he doesn’t ask me if im ok or anything ,he wont evan look at me when i speak to him.He says i ask too many questions and he says i make him feel uncomfortable he is too attached to his phone evan with our children they are noticing things and it’s hard as it will destroy them if they knew the truth .I want my husband how can i make him see me in a different light?
How can i get him to open up with out questions?
How can i make him feel safe as I’ve tried and he shuts down.
I find it hard to sleep in our bed because i miss him so much and my heart is in pain as i just want him to tell me he loves me and everything will be ok.
What can i say to him he knows i want him ,he knows i love him.
He sent me this ” Nothing so stop you ain’t helping don’t know how many times I need tell you to make it clear and if things carry on surely won’t be staying on this sofa anymore will find somewhere to stay simple as I keep telling you I’m done but you not listening, do not do anything for me”.I still do his dinner and pack lunch and give him breakfast ,wash his clothes,put them away and make sure he has what he needs .Feels like he doesn’t want me or need me anymore.
What do i do as I’m finding it hard to sleep it’s on my mind evan when im doing things feels like he has no respect for me as he always on his phone but he talks about the future so makes me confused.
Please give me ideas and help so i can fix my marriage.

Thank you
Keri

[Keri A]

Hi spyce

Thank you for writing back,I love it when my husband asks me to help him. Im not sure if he cares about me in any way but today i told him i appreciate him and im greatful of him and thanked him for providing for us .He tried to be negative so i said it agen and he said thanks,then he messaged me about something so i told him i was proud of him.He came home from work and we went to do the shopping and he was talking to me a little bit asking a few things and telling me a few things aswell and every morning before he goes to work i tell him i love him ,i dont get a response from him but he will message saying thank you for his pack lunch he does not ask me if im ok or what have i been up to as he dont seem interested ao trying not to exspect anything back in return and have no exspectations. I feel like he compares me to the women he speaks to!I am kind and considerate and loving i show in my actions in every possible way i can .I know he feels gulity as he wont look at me when im speaking to him and i know he is probably hurting inside for hurting me but he wont show it or tell me .I got married when i was 24 and he was 27 .He loves his food and people do call him fat with banta but he really isn’t in my eyes he is the way i want him i tell him i love you the way you are your not fat as he has broad shoulders.I like to talk about feelings out in the open but when i do he shuts down and tells me to leave him be .He knows im too good for him but i dont think i am in my eyes .I guess i just want us back but stronger than before and connected on deeper level,the reason i want him im madly in love with him always have been and always will be he has saved me a lot and we have always depended on each other as i don’t have any family him and the kids are what i have and what we built together .My husband has always protected me and always been by my side and saved me from thinģs he provides for us and he gives me stability and makes me feel safe.Before i love being around him cause i can just be my self and he knows my inns and outs and still accepts me .He did make me feel special buy buying me gifts and would come home with a starbucks for me or he would buy me whatever i wanted ,he always told me he loves me and he appreciates me and that he wouldn’t know what to do with out me always made me feel like i was his one anď only.I want him around because i dont see my life with out him if im honest i don’t know if that is bad but he makes me feel safe in the house or anytime im with him he makes me blush ,my heart pounds when he pulls up on the drive.He is changing he is coming out of comfort zone with some things but he dont really like to go out as he loves his laptop watching movies and series he likes his own company.

Thank you
Keri

[Keri A]

Hi spyce

Thank you for getting back to me ,we mostly text when he is at work or i am and he does sometimes text me while we are in the house and i will go down stairs and speak to him.He will tell someone what he thinks and he will flip if he is made angry at work and he does speak out .Yes he messages them and pictures but i dont know if anything physical but its not just one quiet a few if im honest all different ages he tells me not to worry about them that they are nothing and does apologise when he knows he has hurt me ,I did try that message you sent me and then he said thanks and then asked me to do something for him .I dont know why he says it i think it’s because he thinks i deserve better and he can not give me what i need or want,he doesn’t say why but he wants me to be happy as he keeps hurting me .”He said he doesn’t want to be with me and evan if im nit with you or here i will always have your back”.I have been giving him space i do his pack lunch for him in the the morning and see him off to work it used to be a passionate kiss but now its a hug,I give him his space i ask him how work is when he is back and he will answer and have a talk and then i would serve him his dinner when has fresned up ,im trying i am looking after my self trying to tone my self and dress differently speak differently and change my hair different perfumes, different body creams and going to be going gym soon and keeping busy and going out to my friends aswell and being with our kids when not at school .My husband goes out and tells me were he is going sometimes he doesn’t come back and he comes back next day but thats only he has gone to a family members house.when he goes out we dont really talk as i try to leave him but hes stubbon he ysed to message me all the time and now hardly doesn’t but im trying not to be mad and ignore that behaviour .I think im still trying to understand the purpose meaning but i do tell him i appreciate him and he says the same and he always says thank you as well.
Look forward to hearing back .
Keri

[Keri A]

Well my husband mostly spends time alone as he likes his own comfort but i understood that and we spent time to gether ,Its been the last couple of months he seems depressed and stressed but wont open to me .I know his moms health is bad but wont speak about that and another family issue as well.We have kids together,he is constantly on his phone and does not look at me when i speak to him he says he loves me but thinks he is not right for me after 12years of being together.My husband has cheated on me in the past by talking to women he says sometimes he gets bored and he said he trys to change .Before my husband used to buy me gifts tell me loves me spends time with me and always wanted to be at home intimacy was good attention was good communication was good.With his feelings he mostly texts but we communicate via text and contact or call but all of that has stopped he does not evan ask if im ok or how my day was.I have tried everything and im trying to keep my self busy, im trying to take care of my self as well as due to stress, i have lost a lot of weight but still look good i do have insecurties because of somethings which he knows and do have trouble with self esteem and i do feel unwanted like he is just not interested in me .He used to kiss me on the lips before going out or going any were now its a hug and he confuses me,he does not want to sleep next to me either .Im really drained and i dont understand why he is being the way he is im madly in love with him i just need some help or a message or advice on how to get him to be fully attracted and interested in me i really want my deep connection back with him .Please tell me how i can achieve it as my husband is soo stubbon when he makes his mind up his mind is made. Thank you
Keri

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