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One more thing about purchasing the programs even though I’m not in a relationship… I figured being prepared BEFORE I’m in a relationship would be better than trying to fix one that’s already failing. I know not all relationships are able to be troubleshooted ahead of time, but I look at it this way: you can’t go wrong learning how to speak to and treat a man the way he responds to positively.
Hi Heidi! Thank you so much for your wonderful reply!
I purchased the program for a couple of reasons. One, I pretty much love everything James Bauer puts out! 😊 His emails really resonate with me, and so did the “His Secret Obsession” program. You’re probably wondering why I purchased “His Secret Obsession” too, LOL. The second reason is that I wanted to try to understand men more (what internally drives them) BEFORE I found myself in a new relationship after my husband’s passing. My husband was a functioning alcoholic and life with him was chaotic at best. Our communication was terrible and I didn’t want to make the same mistakes with another man that I made with him. So I was hoping for a “preemptive strike,” so to speak, by purchasing these programs and trying to understand men better before starting any new relationship.
I have been friends with Bill for almost 2 years, but we really just started going to dinner together (about once a month) last July. It’s normally just the 2 of us, although occasionally we also meet up with his buddy, who I met at the same time that I first met Bill. I was attracted to Bill as soon as I met him, but I would say it’s only been in the last 3 or 4 months that Bill has been much flirtier with me than he ever was before. We went to a concert together last month and he kissed me several times (full-on makeout, not just friendly pecks). Then 2 days later he dropped the bomb that he is “unavailable” and he apologized for giving me signals otherwise. I told him I was unaware that he was seeing someone, because he never mentioned anything like that. He then said that he ISN’T seeing anyone, so I came to the conclusion that he meant he is unavailable “emotionally.” I knew about his bad breakup, so I assumed this was the reason. I didn’t ask for further explanation because he doesn’t owe me one. He said he’s unavailable, and I respected that.
He was in that relationship for 2 years and they lived together. He hasn’t said so, but I have a very strong feeling that she cheated on him with a friend of his. Bill said they “broke up and then she started dating a guy in their friend circle”, which Bill found hurtful. But like I said, I believe she actually CHEATED on him with this friend. When I met Bill almost 2 years ago, he and his ex had already broken up. They remained friends for a while afterwards (Bill is a Gemini and Gemini men often remain friends with exes). But he told me 7 months ago that he and she “had their time, and it’s completely over.”
Your suggestions and examples were incredibly helpful, especially the part about speaking to their higher self. Makes so much sense. And he does make me laugh–nearly constantly! So that will be a very easy one.
At this time I’m not sure how long I’m willing to wait for him. I’m definitely keeping myself open to meeting new people and having new experiences. I’m just now starting to become the person I was always meant to be now that I’m not constantly struggling to run a chaotic household. It feels exhilarating to be attracted to someone. I try to get out with friends as much as possible (sometimes I even go out by myself) and if the opportunity comes up I will not hesitate to go on dates with other guys. You are absolutely right: I need the experience.
