[Amal U]

Hey!
I don’t know, I’m just very confused. I’m not sure my heart is ready to give up on him and just stop cold turkey. I also don’t think I should keep getting hurt every day like I am. I’ve thought about slowly decreasing my interaction with him and I’ve tried doing that. But I’m making myself miserable when I try to stop myself from reaching out or replying back when he texts.

Part of me wants to wait for him to move away in 6 months and then when he’s not here I’ll just have to deal with it. The other part tells me to just cut him off. I know how much that’ll hurt him as well. And I don’t know what I should do.

I guess one thing I maybe should’ve mentioned before, both of us are from a different country. We went to same school there (just didn’t know each other at the time). Moved here for higher studies. Our families are still back home. We have the same social circle. So we can relate on so many different levels. And I only moved to this city about 2 years ago. The only life I’ve known here, he is a big part of that. He’s my entire support system and I know I am his! All of that just makes it a lot a lot harder.

I know eventually I’ll figure it out. Just need to choose one kind of hurt and stick with it I guess!

[Amal U]

Thank you for the reply!

He has only had one longterm relationship which lasted about 5 years. They broke up 2 years ago. She’s now engaged to someone else and getting married soon. I know that on some level, he still blames himself for things not working out between them. He is very close to his parents. And they were part of the reason why his previous relationship broke since they didn’t approve of the girl. I think a part of him is still stuck in the past. I don’t know much about his childhood.

You know there are times when I can tell from his body language that he’s thinking about the possibility of us. That goes on for days and then all of a sudden it changes back. We’re so close, to the point that we finish each other’s sentences all the time and can almost always tell what the other person is thinking or is upset about. I don’t know how to move on without losing him as a friend. And he’s worth too much to lose. He’s been such a great friend to me all this time. He takes care of me like no one else and is always there for me. What makes things more complicated is that he’s moving away in 6 months for a job. The idea of not being able to see him all the time shatters my heart like no other.

I like the idea of grounding myself in reality but I don’t know how to do that. I try to keep myself from texting him everyday. And I feel so so terrible when I’m not talking to him. The only thing that makes me feel better on those days is when I finally text him. I would appreciate any ideas you might have

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