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Marilyn JParticipant
I understand that I should not be initiating too much. I tried to keep it balanced from the beginning. But I feel to get his attention at this point I have to do something to draw him towards me, nothing desperate but I see that it’s crucial to send the right kind of context. James projected that you can turn things around in the most desperate circumstances. Can you suggest a phrase to send him or something to say on the phone? Is there anything that I can do to require respect besides letting him know how I feel so valued and respected with a gentleman?
I’d appreciate it.Marilyn JParticipantToday I responded with “We should go for a run sometime. I’d like to see who’s faster. I bet I could beat you. 😎“ to feed his competitive side. I don’t really think I’m faster but I have a pretty good pace and always have an inner competition with every runner that I pass or tries to pass me. Anyway I hope and don’t think. It’s a bad approach but it won’t so all the magic to getting his full genuine attention. Looking forward to your input
Marilyn JParticipantHello Kanya,
I want to say your feedback from today and yesterday is very valuable to me. I can’t express how much it means. It does make me think and process. I definitely don’t want to wast my time with someone who’s got no self esteem and inabordable to value me. I totally agree that it was morally wrong. I’m not planning to give in but if I can get his attention back with the focus to connect emotionally I would do it. If only that changes things. I will dry clear boundaries, and be even more careful before getting intimate. I am talking to other guys and don’t feel the same way as with him. What I like about him is that he’s ambitious that he thinks love grows with the day to day experiences. He’s a manly man a Logical person. We both share the same religious beliefs. There are some more things but a lot I haven’t explored and can just day that instinctively this is a person who could be a great match given circumstances and time as a sensitive part, I was emotionally unavailable and even with the right person it would not have worked I believe.
The 10 most important qualities are
-catholic
-affectionate
-patient
-Generous
-stable
-disciplined
-protective
-intelligent
-Family oriented
-stylish
This is somewhat based on a previous list I created when I had a relationship coach
The last one sounds superficial but I mean I want to be with someone who dresses well and also enjoys going on a whim from time to time. I’ve met With guys who are overly casual in the way they dress and the things they do, I like nice things I’ll admit it but even more so that they take care of themselves and things. If he has a nice car that’s great but even better is that the car he drives is clean. Some details but I care about that, I am very organized and to me it shows that he got it together. Is there any suggestion you have to get his attention while I also guard myself a little?
I have to admit that after your advice yesterday I thought abort ir so intense. I brought awareness but simultaneously even more curiosity about him and decided to send him a casual message, since it had been a month I wrote “Hey, you just popped into my head while I was running on the beach and I wanted to say hi. How are you?” He replied A few hours Later f with “I am also at the boardwalk” He goes on runs there as well. He lives less then a mile from me.
I want to get his attention and hope that he’s going to be treating me respectful but I now also know how to use the right signals to provoke that behavior. Can you share something I could do?Marilyn JParticipantI met him once and he showed me he’s interested In person. On the phone he liked talking to me too. He’s confused I believe. I don’t think he was looking for a girlfriend but very drawn to me when we connected. From what I learned from James is that it is possible to turn things around and make him desperate to connect emotionally. That’s what I’m looking for. He’s definitely in his prince phase. He still hasn’t achieved his goal but likes to have a significant other to support him with that. I know to every problem there is a cause and finding that out you can alter the outcome.
Marilyn JParticipantI think we truly would make a great couple. I want to get down to what is blocking him and than start over
Marilyn JParticipantWe were connecting for less then 2 months. He made it a point from the beginning he wanted to take it slowly with starting a friendship and see if we’re compatible. I honestly would move faster and start romantically but also no sex in the beginning
Marilyn JParticipantHey Heidi,
Me met once when he got tooth pain and he suggested to meet for a drink when he feels better. He sent me a message soon after that I look very pretty. He appreciated when I called him the next day to see how it went at his dental appointment. He wanted to know more about my personal life and I told him that I’d tell him when we see each other again in person. Ha texted less and I was but let it be I knew he still wasn’t feeling well. From my understanding James is recommending to use his techniques on any guy that he gives the key to how to allow a man to open up emotionally even players. I don’t think this man is a player, I do think there is probably truth in that he’s not in a good place of his life, the pandemic may contribute to that. He started off very upfront. Even inviting me to his work twice. He wanted to know what I was doing and how my day went and everything. It annoyed me jume gave my number to his friend and that his friend was dishonest about it, I still took it as a compliment because if he did not think I would make a great girlfriend he would not recommend me to his friend. I left the conversation open at the end. Obviously I haven’t made any contact. I don’t know but I do really see a lot of potential in him, I’m very picky. He’s my type and he alI wants to pursue his dream, he’s a hard worker and enjoys nice things. We share similar interests. It’s not easy for a guy to catch my attention.
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