[Taji J]

Hello!
Thank you for responding. To answer your questions, No I don’t feel that I’m the reason he has t been able to find success. I’ve given him everything that is available to him to be able to cultivate his own success in this world. He has had access to any finances that I have in order to build his dream, he has had access to time and freedom, and he has had access to information and networks to be able to me make things happen. I personally feel that he was given 10 years to relive the adolescent hood that he did not have because of the circumstances of his youth. I gave him time to find himself because he was not ready or prepared call to be a man at the time that we got married. These are things that I am reconciling with right now. I definitely feel that he has allowed a lot of self-doubt, insecurities, and fear. He wants to be revered and respected in our marriage and family. And yes, in order to do that he is attempting to make me dim myself and make myself smaller so that he can have those needs met. As I said in the first post, I have been wearing the masculine hat in the relationship as the breadwinner, when I come home I hand him the money, and I attempt to switch hats and put on my motherly, wifely, Feminine, sex goddess hat. Embodying all of those things in the course of one day is extremely taxing. I am emotionally and physically depleted. I cannot control what he does. I cannot use my energy to transform him into the type of man that I want and need, but also the type of man that he says he wants to be. What I can do is to transform myself. I’ve looked at the person that I’ve become in the last 10+ years and I have the capability to change the things that I do not like about the person that I am today. I want to show up in the best possible way for my kids, and for myself most importantly. That is how I found your course. I have been working on learning who I am and trying to better understand Men. What I would like to see happen is for the level of self love that I have for myself to rise, and for him to look at me as someone who is deserving of the type of man that he claims he wants to be. I don’t think that I was presenting myself in the best way by having low confidence, not knowing exactly who I was, and not presenting myself in my best feminine energy. This other person is able to show up for him like that because her husband, (yes her husband)is a provider and protector For her. So while I’m at work every day all day, and her husband is at work every day providing for her, she and my husband have the luxury of being at home to cultivate this relationship.

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