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Hello,
I’m not recovering for Covid I had a really bad analysis reaction that lead to months in the hospital and being trached but thank you for the kind words. Idk maybe a month break would be best. Today is the first time I have seen that he has not watched my snaps so maybe he has forgotten about me already. In that case it will just be up to me to forget about him. I was going to just ghost him and send his stuff back I borrowed with no note but that may not be ok because I wouldn’t want that but then again he may have forgotten about me. I could always say “I know I said I just needed a little break but I think I’m just going to step back for a month and see what happens. “ Honestly I have no idea what to say. It doesn’t matter because he’s not going to date me but I’m not try to hurt him and make things worse. I feel bad enough and him not watching myself let’s me know he’s either sad or he’s forgotten me which makes it harder not easier.
He doesn’t say anything bad about his ex of 15 years. He says she is a good mom and that’s it other than the stuff that happened with their relationship.
He had is first daughter when he was 21 and was with his girlfriend some time before that. They were together for 15 years and he put her through school. He stayed away from his first a lot working (he had a second daughter 2 years after) even with working all the time making 6figures his bank account would be drained by here. To the point he couldn’t buy himself lunch. He put her through school and she moved off for a job and ended up with someone else. He has custody of the girls they don’t even go to see their mom. He has dated some but nothing serious enough to warrant them meeting his girls. He is very close to his family very close they do everything together. He is quiet and keeps all of his feelings to himself. He is like a turtle one wrong move and back in his shell he goes. When he was growing up he was sent off to be a migrant worker and was often just him up there all summer without his family. His brother a little younger than him had to some but not as much and the younger siblings didn’t have to at all. He says he can’t really relate to their childhoods or his daughters because they are totally different than his. He is super close to the brother closest in age to him. He even works at the same place as him. I am thinking about ending our friendship because I feel more than just friends for him and he can’t do the co-worker thing. He watches every snap story I put up and usually the first one to watch it. We laugh at the same stuff and have the same interest so it’s very hard to see his name on anything or to tell him our friendship is over. I can’t keep doing this in and out. Every time he goes out I have to work to get him back in and once in he is all in and I begin thinking he could actually want me or I could convince him the co-worker thing is fine I wouldn’t hurt him and I love him unconditionally but then he does the you said we are just friends we’re just friends I sent you that stuff because you are my friend. I always think of when you went off on me and even though it was my fault I think of that and say no that’s why I can’t date a coworker.
