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Hi, Kanya!
I’m in a quandary: I want to set boundaries but I also want him back. I do get that I am probably feeding into “bad” behavior. I am okay with not talking to/being around him for a while…possibly meeting someone else. That will definitely be his loss BUT, right now, he is what I want. So, yes, I need help/ideas on how to set boundaries but also on how to gwt him back IF I decide, in the end, that he is what I want. I know he’ll come back, that’s the cycle, but I want him back how we were in the beginning AND on the boundaries/terms(?) that are healthy for both of us. Do you or Heidi have any suggestions?
Heidi,
Thank you SO much for your response! You make total sense. I just recently started to see the pattern and understand it’s unhealthy for me. I am willing to let this go, let HIM go for my happiness, though it does hurt a bit.
My next questions: when he comes back around, do I engage or no? If so, how do I do that in a healthy way? I DO want him but I don’t want this cycle nor the disappointment. Do I talk to him and let him know the reasons that I’m stepping away? And, if so, how do I do that? At this moment, I feel like I might want to gain his attention again at a later time so those ideas would be helpful, but right now, I have to choose me.
Thank you, again, Heidi!
