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Hi Kanya,
I think she is right. I am trying to make him as my source of happiness, which is wrong. He should be able to make me happy by being him, not on command.
The way I was approaching the situation made him feel tired. Because probably on his own, he felt like he was doing enough.
I think I should take this time to re-evaluate myself and the relationship. I just hope that I the end of this I will be able to make a decision that is good for both of us. Actually he wanted to break up first and then after he suggested the break.I really really do love him, but sometimes love is not enough. I will see what he comes up with at the end of this break and I will see how to proceed by there. If he wants to break up , how should I handle that?
I want an honest answer.Hi Heidi,
I understand what you mean. To be honest, we never really used to talk on the phone that much. I am not a phone person either I would say, but I feel like just talking to him. Since we can’t meet in person, I told myself why not?
I find in myself this habit of not being interested in men who give me too much attention, which is really weird because I crave his attention.
When we first started to date, he wanted to see me all the time and at that time I wasn’t really interested in him, so I didn’t give him much time. But now I am. I don’t want to loose him.
He usually doesn’t like to talk about his problems, but if you ask he will talk about it.
Sometimes I think me and him we are much alike, I don’t open up much either easily. He used to complain about that and some of my friends says I am reserved. But I chose to work on that because I want my relationship to work , but I don’t know what is going on with him.
When you say “instead of approaching him telling him what he needs to change so you can feel happy, you approach with questions and curiosity. You approach with the mindset of wanting to understand what is happening for HIM instead of making the entire conversation about your needs and what he isn’t doing to meet them.” What do you mean? How can I do that?I try to reflect on all that during this time. But tell me, after the break. if I still want him , should I wait for him to Reinitiate contact or it’s ok if i break the silence first? And what can I say when If I am the one breaking the silence without sounding desperate?
