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How can we get pass this? I know I need to stop looking at his phone. But how can I help him fix his fears that his ex left behind?
To my understanding, he was serious about his last relationship. He told me she was the one, he even bought her a promise ring for their one year anniversary. Three months after their anniversary he was already planning something for their next anniversary, he even wrote a poem. They broke up 4 months after their one year anniversary. He forgave her for cheating and everything. He tried to changed to be the guy she wanted but it also sounded like he tried to control her by not wanting her to talk to other guys because he was super jealous. He would give her $200 whenever she hung out with friends and he would always buy her something whenever he went out. According to him she broke up with him because he push her away, but I think she broke up with him because she had found someone else. She’s like him in that aspect. Always have to be with someone. He was the other guy before they got into a relationship. By the sound of it they also argued a lot.
I don’t want him to give me money. But knowing how he was with his ex it makes me feels like he doesn’t care about me.
We were together for 9 months for Valentine’s. I bought him a gift and he didn’t do anything for me. I would have been content if he just spent time with me but instead he went outside and done his gone thing.
Around that time I say something about how our 1 year anniversary was coming up. He laugh and say what anniversary, we’re not married. That hurt, knowing that for his ex he bought a promise ring.He was talking to other girls when we first got together, I had a feeling that he was but I wasn’t sure, and then I found out. He stop talking to other girls because we agreed not to be friends with the opposite sex, since we’re both jealous.
He literally accused me of cheating day three of college when he drop me off because I apparently shared a look with a guy.
Within 2 weeks I got pregnant and stayed pregnant for 11 weeks before I had a miscarriage. He didn’t talk to any girls during that time.
So I think he didn’t talk to other girls for about 4 months.
Maybe within 2 weeks after the miscarriage he started talking to other girls. He would say stuff like “you’re too beautiful to be alone” “I’ll keep you company” “5 years not that big of a difference.”
When I found out about it we argued and that when our relationship started to go down hill because I found out by looking through his phone, she messaged him at midnight and his phone was beside of me.
After I guess about 2 weeks things got better between us but there was still a distance.
Within about a month he came home all pissy and he if I can’t trust him then we’re screwed. That he can be friends with whoever he wants. I told him we agreed not to be friends with the opposite sex, that whenever he felt differently about that agreement then he should have told me instead of hiding it.
He stayed mad at me for 2 weeks and wouldn’t even talk to me.
Then we were good for a week and then the next week he told me that thinks we were better off as friends and that he no longer feel the passion for me. Then after he told me that he told me we’re still in a relationship but he wants the old me, the sweet innocent me back. I also found out that during that time he was talking to a girl. He was trying to see her, take her out for lunch. He told her that he wish he had gotten with her when he had the chance. So he wished he never gotten with me because he was talking to both of us in the beginning of our relationship. It like he wished everything that we shared never happened.It been 6 weeks since the last argument and things seem better between us but I can’t help to feel that it’s only a better of time before he blow again.
